With 'Coming Out to Dead People,' Ricky Sim Tells His Story with Candor, Humor and Dick Jokes

Ricky Sim is a Malaysian-born, NYC-based standup comedian and storyteller with quite a story to tell. He has performed at many of the most popular comedy venues in NYC, LA, and Toronto, as well as a very special space in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. In April 2025 Ricky was selected to perform at the Moth Mainstage. He has also performed at the New York Comedy Festival, the New York Queer Comedy Festival, and the Asian Comedy Festival.

Though lovingly described as "just another lawyer-turned-comedian-hack, but gay," Ricky takes on some of life's biggest issues with humor, candor, and vulnerability. He's also got enough dick jokes and related humorous tales to satisfy anyone's thirst for, well, dick jokes and Grindr stories.

His one-man show, "Coming Out to Dead People," got its humble beginnings in a karaoke room in the basement of a Chinatown, NYC restaurant. From there it was on to Off-Broadway with performances in both 59E59 Theater and the Soho Playhouse. Its debut in the summer of 2023 at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe enjoyed multiple sold-out engagements and rave reviews. Next up was London's Off-West End theater, Soho Theatre, where it was selected as one of the 2024 Off-West End (The Offies) OffFest Finalists. The critically-acclaimed show was then invited to perform at the Assembly Fringe for the Edinburgh Festival Fringe of 2024.

Sim brings it to Joe's Pub on July 14. For more information, click here.

"Coming Out to Dead People" isn't your typical, run-of-the-mill coming out story. There were cultural clashes aplenty, a father who tried to promote his bachelor son to suitable women with the promise of a piece of his valuable real estate portfolio (which didn't exist), and the fact that his mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer just as he was about to come out. There are also the issues of dating, hooking up, and the impending grief of losing your mother.

Sim packs quite an emotional wallop in the 60-minute show that's certain to make you laugh out loud, cry, and experience the ever-present array of human emotions that make you feel alive.

EDGE recently had the chance to catch up with the comic as he prepares to bring his show back to New York City where it all began. Because of his busy schedule, the interview was conducted vial email.

EDGE: How old were you when you immigrated to the United States?

Ricky Sim: I was 13 when I first immigrated to the United States. That was early 2000s, when people were still speculating whether or not Ricky Martin was gay and I was wondering why I couldn't stop staring at his hip when he danced.

EDGE: How old were you when you came out?

Ricky Sim: I started coming out to close friends when I was 15, but it was not until in my mid-20s I stopped intentionally hiding my sexuality at work.

EDGE: Tell me a little about queer culture in Malaysia?

Ricky Sim: Queer culture is actually quite vibrant in Malaysia, with quite a lot of support from the public, from the inner city, and the younger generation, although the government stance has been critical on LGBT and anti-sodomy laws are still in place. But just like anywhere in the world, when there's heavy governmental oppression, the community thrives with flourishing creativities and strong supportive bonds among each other. The community vibe reminds me of the LGBT community in NYC back in the early 2000s. People look out for each other because it is important to survive and find community, rather than finding ways to be the next chance to go viral online.

EDGE: What was it like for you to play at a queer-inclusive safe space in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia?

Ricky Sim: It was interesting, because I was not allowed to promote the show due to the queer nature of the show, and we could not tell the audience members who bought tickets where the venue was until the day of. It is very common to have undercover police in the comedy show there, which means comedians usually don't have to worry about shows not selling, because we would often get audience members from the government.

EDGE: Do you think your comedy impacts the lives of queer Asians/Malaysians?

Ricky Sim: Although my show is very specific to queer, Asian immigrant experience, and many queer Asians may relate to it, there were also many people who came up to talk to me after the show who were non-Asians, straight, who have lost their loved ones in the family, and figuring out how to deal with grief and acceptance. Mortality and grief are universally relatable, and I am proud and thankful that my show can have that impact to many different audience members.

EDGE: Without giving away the show, can you tell me how your family reacted to your coming out?

Ricky Sim: Not well. I never came out voluntarily, but when my family found out, it was also during the time my mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Both my family and I were struggling with the question of "Should we tell mom?" She was already dealing with enough pain and agony from cancer and leaving the world and us – should we just let her leave blissfully ignorant?

Is my coming out when my mom was dying of cancer really for me, or for her? That was the question I was thinking at that time, and also the question my show is trying to explore.

EDGE: The reviews of "Coming Out to Dead People" include words like beautiful, brilliantly upbeat, heartfelt, darkly comic, laugh, cry, delicate moments, raunchy, a lot of dick jokes. Kudos for covering so many bases. Tell us what to expect when we see it.

Ricky Sim: All of that, plus some early-2000s Mariah and Ashanti music references. #lambs

EDGE: I would never have thought this when watching you on stage, but you were a lawyer. How did you go from law to standup comedy?

Ricky Sim: I thought, "If I get a law degree, and if people heckle me on stage, I could sue them." Just kidding. I have always wanted to try both law and standup comedy since I was in college. I had the balls to take the LSAT, but not the balls to do open mics.

EDGE: Was your family upset when you told them you were pursuing a career in comedy?

Ricky Sim: They do not know yet. Shhhh... that's for another solo show.

EDGE: Did your father really try to pimp you out with his property portfolio? If so, is he still at it?

Ricky Sim: Yes, but now I wish he can bring that same level of energy and passion to pimp me out on Grindr instead. "Would you be down to have fun with my son? He's a good service top. I taught him well."

EDGE: Are you single? Dating? Relying on your father to find you Mr. Right on Grindr?

Ricky Sim: I am married to a murse. That's man nurse, not a man purse.

EDGE: You've brought the show to Austin, Chicago, and LA as part of this tour. Your final stop will be at Joe's Pub in New York City on July 18th. What's next for you after that?

Ricky Sim: I am working on a script based on the show. I want to bring the story to the screen.

EDGE: If you could look back all the way to the beginning of your life, is there anything you would do differently?

Ricky Sim: I wish I had started doing comedy earlier, but I am also glad that I went to law school and worked in corporate for a decade before pursuing comedy.

EDGE: Any advice for young Asians struggling with their sexuality?

Ricky Sim: Always make sure you are in a safe, secure position before considering coming out. Not every family is the same, and the coming-out narrative from the West may not always work in the East.

EDGE: How about something for lawyers out there who have dreams, but they're not chasing them?

Ricky Sim: You can always come back for those billable hours; they are not going anywhere.

Ricky Sims brings "Coming Out to Dead People" to Joe's Pub, 425 Lafayette Street, (At Astor Place), New York, NY 10003 on July 18. For ticket information, follow this link.

For more on Ricky Sim, visit his website.