Dan Howell and Phil Lester Reveal 16-Year Relationship, Say Coming Out Felt Like a “Weight Had Been Lifted”

After more than a decade of speculation and persistent fan curiosity, Dan Howell and Phil Lester—two of YouTube’s most influential creators—have publicly confirmed that they have been in a romantic relationship since 2009. The long-awaited announcement was made on October 13, 2025, through a video titled"Are Dan and Phil in a Relationship? The Truth" on their shared YouTube channel. The video became an instant sensation, rapidly surpassing three million views and generating a wave of supportive reactions from their global fanbase .

Howell and Lester’s friendship and creative partnership began in 2009, when they first met in person after interacting online. Within months, their chemistry grew into a romantic relationship, one they chose to keep private for nearly 16 years. During this time, the pair became household names in online media, amassing millions of followers through their individual channels, joint gaming content, and multiple live tours .

Despite their public personas, Howell and Lester maintained strict boundaries around their personal lives. Both came out as gay in separate videos in 2019, but they did not address the nature of their relationship until this recent “hard launch” .

In their video and the premiere episode of their new podcast,"Hard Launch with Dan and Phil," the couple explained the reasons behind their decision to keep their romance private for so long. Howell, in particular, spoke openly about the personal and societal pressures he faced, referencing his upbringing and the lack of acceptance for LGBTQIA+ people during the early years of their relationship. He described how public scrutiny and invasive speculation made him feel violated, noting, “Phil was my safe space… so when other people tried to grab it and drag it into the light, I felt completely violated” .

The couple also cited concerns about their mental health and the importance of protecting their private lives. “It’s not always perfect,” Lester emphasized in their announcement video. “Don’t get it into your head that we are the ideal of human partnerships” .

Both Howell and Lester described an overwhelming sense of relief after making their relationship public. “Posting that video felt like a huge relief,” Howell said during their podcast debut. “I just felt like a weight had been lifted. I was worried I was gonna post it—or we were gonna post it—and be like, ‘Oh no, we’ve made a huge mistake’” .

Howell credited his therapist with encouraging him to take the step, recounting, “Dan, you need to stop being scared and just rip the plaster off” .

Fan reactions were overwhelmingly positive. Social media was flooded with supportive comments, memes, and messages from the “Phandom”—the nickname for their devoted online community, many of whom are LGBTQIA+ youth who found solace in the pair’s content. The announcement also resonated with viewers who had long speculated about their dynamic but respected their privacy .

Howell and Lester’s decision to reveal their relationship carries significant weight for LGBTQIA+ representation in digital media. As visible, long-term partners with a global platform, their coming out story reaffirms the importance of authentic representation and the value of safe spaces for LGBTQIA+ people. Their openness about mental health, privacy, and the challenges of being out in the public eye provides a valuable perspective for fans, especially those navigating their own identities in less accepting environments .

The duo’s story also highlights the evolution of social attitudes toward LGBTQIA+ relationships since the late 2000s. When Howell and Lester began dating, same-sex marriage was not yet legal in the UK, and discussions about sexual orientation were often taboo online and offline. Their experience reflects broader shifts in LGBTQIA+ visibility and acceptance, as well as the ongoing need for privacy and agency when sharing personal information .

With the launch of their podcast and the revival of their gaming channel, Howell and Lester are entering a new era of their careers—one marked by greater transparency and connection with their audience. Their willingness to discuss the realities of their partnership, both the joys and the struggles, sets a new standard for authenticity among online creators .

They have clarified that, while sharing their story is important, they do not wish to be seen as an ideal couple or role models for perfection. Instead, they hope to inspire others to embrace their own stories, whatever form they may take.

Dan Howell and Phil Lester’s announcement marks a significant cultural moment, not only for their fans but for all those who value visibility, honesty, and inclusivity. By coming out as a couple, they have provided a powerful example of living authentically and on their own terms—a message that resonates far beyond the world of YouTube.